Making a Stance

[00:00:11] Speaker A: Good morning. This is Vicki with Rooted in Radiant. I have in studio with me today Landy. She will introduce herself in a brief moment. My topic for today is making a star, so you can introduce yourself. [00:00:26] Speaker B: Good morning, everyone. [00:00:26] Speaker A: I am Yolandi Hawkins. [00:00:28] Speaker B: I am Vicky's best friend for almost 20 years. [00:00:31] Speaker A: Oh, yes, yes. Best DND on speaking about best friends. Yolandi's life has inspired me in so many ways. I've known her for plus 20 years and I've seen so many changes in her life taking place. And you know, this, this channel and podcasts are all about practicality, reality, and how we can get to a place, from one place to another place, just practically, you know, it's. It's awesome to say, or it's very easy to say, let's pray it through, let's do it. But the questions are, how do I do it? How does one get from point A to point B? Which is exactly what we are. We are going to chat on today. So, like I've said, I've seen you grow, which has been such an honor, and I would like you to just tell our viewers. Was there a specific time in your life that you had to decide for God? [00:01:34] Speaker B: I think my journey started way back in Emmanuel. I came to a point where I thought I should give my life to God and that. That this is the road I would like to take. So I got baptized. [00:01:54] Speaker A: The same day as me. [00:01:55] Speaker B: Yeah, I think it's back in 2008. I can't even remember, but it's been a while. And since then I haven't looked back. And it has been quite a journey ever since. Just each day taking it day by day and just being better than yesterday. [00:02:10] Speaker A: Yeah. Is there a specific reason? Normally people start following the Lord when stuff is really tough, especially when they didn't grow up as heavy churchgoers. And so normally people go to God when it's really bad. Was it the same in your life or was it a decision that you just made because you knew it was the right thing to do? [00:02:35] Speaker B: I don't think it was like, it's. It got bad. And then I was like, no, I have to knock things now. Like, like make a decision. I think I. I did grow up in a Christian household. My mom has been quite a foundation for us in Jesus and she took us to church, we went to Sunday schools, and then we were. We were actually there in here. [00:03:01] Speaker A: Yeah, that, that stage. [00:03:04] Speaker B: And then we came over to Emanuel and I joined. It was that time, I think the light bulbs or the Whatever that stage, and it just went from there. There was. I always knew this was the road I would like to take. It wasn't. Times do get tough, and I think just growing day by day and strengthening your faith has been. Yeah, it has been a journey. [00:03:31] Speaker A: Yeah. So, yeah, yeah, I think I. I know the answer because I. Obviously you and I talk about this a lot, but, you know, there's a certain power. I almost use a very bad word now. There's a certain power when we in our families, when we decide to break certain things. Not necessarily that the way our family did things were wrong. It's just you. When you have kids yourself, you look at something and you decide, I want to change this. Mine wasn't bad, but I want to be a trendsetter. I want to be a chain break. I want. I want things to be different. This is what I want for my children. So in light of that, what would you say you are trying to do different than the way we were all raised? [00:04:16] Speaker B: I think just in the way we think. I think I've always struggled breaking that survival mode, not just getting through day by day, but really starting to live. And when my daughter was born, I had a moment where I thought that I would like to do things better. I have this one chance, and I would really like for her to grow up looking back and thinking, yo, what a blessed life I had. So when she was born, I really made a decision where I would like to raise her in. In faith and knowing Jesus and that when she faces difficulties or anything that she faces or goes to Jesus, you know. [00:05:05] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:05:06] Speaker B: And in my mind as well, I had to, like I said, break that survival, my stinking thinking, you know, so that was definitely one thing that I wanted to break was the way I think. And I would like her to as well, grow up with a steady mind and knowing which way to turn without. And, I mean, it took me years battling how I thought about things and how I handled things. So, yeah, I think that is definitely something I would like her to know and to grow up having a steady mind and just moving forward. [00:05:44] Speaker A: Yeah. So one of my next questions. What were some of the hardest patterns and mindsets you had to break, which is now obviously one of these things. I think breaking a pattern in your mind is probably one of the hardest things to do. It's easy to decide to yourself, you know, if you're a sports person, I'm going to get up tomorrow and do sport or I'm going to cut this or cut that or not include this. In my. It's easier for certain personalities, but mindsets or personalities through the bank, it's not easy. So what was one of the hardest things that you had to, to reign your mind in? [00:06:16] Speaker B: I think thinking I wasn't enough, that I had to earn love or to prove myself. [00:06:24] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:06:27] Speaker B: And also people pleasing, you know, to choose peace over people pleasing. [00:06:32] Speaker A: Yeah. So. Yeah. [00:06:34] Speaker B: And, and start living. [00:06:36] Speaker A: Yeah. Just so practically. How did you change that mindset? Did you prayed a lot? [00:06:42] Speaker B: Yeah, I had some good sessions with you as well, some encouragement and motivation and I had to remind myself that the vision of God that He gave me was something I had to focus on. [00:06:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:06:58] Speaker B: So. Yeah. But praying a lot and spending time in his presence and just being in church and fellowshipping with like minded people was also quite important. [00:07:08] Speaker A: I think that's one of the most important things for our journey as is if we become isolated and you can spend as much time with the Lord as you want. There's a whole, I don't want to call it a list, but there's a whole pedigree that you. Certain things to help you grow and to help you progress. And if you don't tap into all of them, that's. It doesn't have to be at once, but at different stages of your life. We lack. I mean God isn't displeased, but, but in our human life here on earth, we lack. If you don't go and fellowship with other believers or like minded people, you don't learn certain things, you don't see certain things. And so the coolest thing for me is always to do when I'm in missions, when I, when I do something outside, I realize how small my problems actually, actually is. But when you're dealing with a problem, you're like, you feel like you're the only person in the world dealing with this is so horrible until you just get outside. And it doesn't necessarily have to be the poor and needy. It's just missions as a, as a whole know walking past someone in the mall and saying, wow, you look like you really need a hug today. And then all of a sudden when you walk away from there, you feel, you feel elevated. So yeah, the someone once says the best, the best way to connect with God is to actually serve. That's a powerful thing. Yeah, it's just to get out there and to serve. We, we're so busy growing and then you're like, one day, when I'm a mature Christian, I will be involved in missions because if I go now, what Will I say to them, I don't know the word. I don't know this. Sometimes it's fine to just be the barbecue person, you know, fishing up and down and just being there. Because serving is obedience. Obedience is blessed. God is pleased when we obey. Yes, that is true. Okay. How do you face the criticism or doubt from people who just don't understand your choices? Especially in Christianity. [00:09:08] Speaker B: I think it comes down again to some people do not understand the vision God gave you or gave me especially, and that it, again, people pleasing. We don't have to please other people. [00:09:23] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:09:24] Speaker B: Just stay anchored in God. Just again, the obedience and then you will flourish. I don't think you need to explain to other people what it is about or you just live your life and by that example they might even start following. I just do my thing and I don't really care what other people think or say. [00:09:48] Speaker A: It's a very godly principle you're touching on because the word says he speaks in, I think it's Ephesians. He speaks to women and godly households. And he says, your husband will follow. Not by what you say or by what you do, by your silent and humble attitude, you will come to the Lord. Now, we know your husband does serve the Lord, so I'm not speaking about him, but in general. Yeah. Sometimes it's about what we don't say. And then people, people are like, wow, I really want that. And it's a stance you have to take as Christians or as a Christian. There's certain. Many, like two weeks ago. There are some things that you have to say no to. People say, can you come over? Can we do this? Can you do this? And I'm, I'm like, I can't. I just cannot. And it's not because of them, it's because of me. It's just not an environment I want my children to be in. It's just not. They're not bad. [00:10:45] Speaker B: You need to change a few things. [00:10:47] Speaker A: Yes. [00:10:48] Speaker B: You can't live the life you live and expect. [00:10:52] Speaker A: Yes. Which is exactly what this, what this is all about. It's about changing, making those small adjustments so that your legacy, when you leave it behind, people will be like, you know what? That was the first one in my family. Or that was the first one in our, in our, in our household. Or that was the first one to just make a stance for Jesus and we don't have to go and stand on the rooftops and, and be martyrs. It's small changes like this, it's like, it's Making a decision and saying I want my child to be different. Yes. And we always have to be careful because I came come from an African's home. So I never want my parents to feel like I'm saying what they did was bad. That's not what we're saying. There's just different ways people will crucify me for saying this, but discipline your children. Yes. It's a, it's a godly thing to discipline your children. That being said, we don't live in the times where you go and pick a rod from a tree and you beat your child off to death. We don't. It didn't kill any of us when we were younger. I was not beaten with a rod. But, but, but there's different ways because, because where we're going in life. So now we can sit and say, lord, I have a child that's a bit different. And hidings doesn't really help. Timeout doesn't really help. So I need to find ways to connect with my child because I want to have an everlasting effect on their life. When I'm not here to say wow, we, we come at a stage where we look at our parents or our moms and dads and both our fathers are not with us anymore, but we look at our moms and we're like how did you do this? How did you raise four or five kids without help? Without. And, and you just wing it and you're still a normal person. But then we realized the wisdom of God was on their lives as well. [00:12:46] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:12:47] Speaker A: And I wouldn't change anything of my, of my childhood. But for my kids there's a, there's a million ways to do it. And, and I think tapping into to the wisdom and the knowledge of God will definitely help in raising them. [00:13:02] Speaker B: Yes, I agree. [00:13:03] Speaker A: So what practical steps have you taken to raise your daughter to influence your family different? [00:13:10] Speaker B: I speak life over my child every day. I have a thing where when she goes to sleep, I sit with her and I just speak life over a future. I do apologize to her when I am wrong. It is something I also struggled with quite some while actually not just to her, but actually to my entire family and my relationships. When I was wrong, I just feel very entitled that. Yeah, why should I apologize? I mean I'm not wrong or I did it because you don't justifying myself. I have journeyed a lot with that as well. So once I do realize that I was wrong, I do apologize. It doesn't take anything from me. It has become Actually quite easy. So I do apologize when I'm wrong. I do try and listen more than I talk because I, I do sometimes think I can babble a lot. So I do try and listen more than I talk. We do pray together. I have this thing with Arya at night times that we sit and we pray and I ask her questions about Jesus just to see what she understands. And I tell her story, so that's also good. And I, I do teach her about her worth. I think she should know her worth as well. [00:14:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:14:33] Speaker B: Not for what she does, but for who she is. [00:14:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:14:36] Speaker B: So yeah. [00:14:37] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Awesome, awesome practical things. How would you encourage other women in, in the beginning of their journey to just make a change and stand for Jesus? [00:14:49] Speaker B: I would tell them that they're not stuck. Everything is possible. Definitely start small, pray, surround yourself with like minded women. Ask for help. Definitely. I think there's no shame in asking for help. [00:15:04] Speaker A: Yes. [00:15:05] Speaker B: Also I think something we struggle with, we don't ask for help. Especially if you don't have a close relationship like we do. I think some women do struggle with asking for help. There's no shame in it. And then believe that the tiniest of steps. Decount. [00:15:19] Speaker A: Yes. [00:15:20] Speaker B: And that you can change your story at any time. [00:15:22] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:15:23] Speaker B: There's. There's never a time where you can say this is enough or you can make a start. [00:15:29] Speaker A: It's never too late. Yeah. [00:15:30] Speaker B: So. Yeah. [00:15:31] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. Looking back now, have you seen God's. How have you seen God's faithfulness in your story? I think in every tear that he. [00:15:41] Speaker B: Actually turned into strength. Definitely in the peace I have now, the journey I have, I have done or completed till now. Yeah. And then the smile of my children as well. My child. My child. [00:15:59] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:15:59] Speaker B: And in the healing I actually thought I never experienced. [00:16:02] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:16:03] Speaker B: He has really brought me to a place where I have found profound healing and peace. Yeah. So. And that is definitely a big welcome. [00:16:12] Speaker A: Me. Yeah. Yeah. And I think the more time we spend with the Lord, the more whole we become. The. The Word says we will never be whole in this life, only when Christ Jesus comes to fetch us. But as I said, there's. There's things that we can do as human beings to make our life easier. God is not displeased with us and he already knows everything we're going to do, so. So he doesn't sit. You know, Chandler W. Sings that song that says something about a trophy. You're not a God that gives trophies. So God doesn't reward. And now you did well here's your middle for this. Here's for the next phase. Yes, God is God and, and he is pleased with us no matter what we do. But there is certain things that we can do practically to make our own life easier. Otherwise we create obstacles for ourselves. We. We create things. And then tomorrow we're like, oh, why is it going so difficult with me? But you forget about you not being obedient or saying sorry yesterday to your child, going to bed and thinking I'm the mother. Why? Because I said so. Yes. [00:17:16] Speaker B: And. [00:17:16] Speaker A: And that those are. It's funny, but it's. Those are not practical ways to raise our kids. Even if they're three, if they're five, if they're 10, even more of their 30. There's no such thing as. Because I said so. I think the older they get, we can say, go and pray about it and let's have a chance chat. But when they're, when they're young, there is a thing that takes place and it needs to be rooted in godliness. If it's not rooted in godliness, that will become a problem for you within the next few few years. And then you wonder, how, how did it was. This is what I created. How. How did I do it? But you just need to adjust the mirror and look at yourself. And I think this is what it's all about to say, I've adjusted the mirror and I'm going to do everything that I can that God shows me, God reveals to me to bring change about. Okay, so what is the scripture, the one scripture that carried you through your journey? I mean, your journey is not done, but until here, I think I have actually two scriptures. [00:18:14] Speaker B: One, Matt actually touched on this this weekend or last Sunday. Jeremiah 29 lens I have for you that has always been a scripture, actually held on to. [00:18:26] Speaker A: Yes. [00:18:26] Speaker B: That he has hope for me, that he has a future for me. And he has shown me. He has given me this hope and he has given me this future. [00:18:33] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:18:34] Speaker B: And Then also Isaiah 43, verse 19 that says, See, I am doing a new thing and that God is definitely doing a new thing through me. So I am very excited about that as well. And I keep continuing on that those two verses as well. [00:18:52] Speaker A: It's a, it's very encouraging. I love that verse. It. When it says God is doing a new thing, it. It goes on and it says, behold, it springs up. Do not remember the former things. Which, which again, touches on our mind and patterns of our mind. God says, do not. Do not remember it. It's a. It's a, you need to make an active decision, forget about it, and then just start doing it differently. And then to remind yourself that he's. [00:19:18] Speaker B: Doing a new thing. [00:19:19] Speaker A: New is not improved. New is new. It's like totally wiping out and doing a new thing. Which gives me so much hope because if we had to adjust and do 2.1, 2.2, 2.3 all the time, then we would remember the former things. We would be like, yesterday, I did this bad, so let me do this today better. And it's a good, it's a, it's a good compass, but we shouldn't live like that. It should be a total new thing every day. God's M mercies on you every morning. So I have I at this stage in my life, I just, that verse is God's mercies new every morning? I'm like, lord, can we do three mornings, three times new in the morning? Because we need those mercies. We need it. We definitely need it. Yes, sir. Is there anything that you would like to say to our viewers to encourage them? [00:20:09] Speaker B: I think especially to the ladies, I think by sharing our stories and by showing up for each other without judgment, we really do carry each other through. And also by saying, but me too, but look what Jesus did, or look. [00:20:27] Speaker A: What God did for me. [00:20:29] Speaker B: And by holding hands instead of judging each other. I think where we find ourselves sometimes is too scared to speak out because of judgment. [00:20:39] Speaker A: Yeah, people are quick to judge. Yes. [00:20:41] Speaker B: And, you know, pointing fingers. But I think it's important just being together, standing together and sharing our stories and encouraging each other. Just. [00:20:52] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, let us, let us for this week, try and be encourages. Let us be there for one another. Find your Sister in Christ supporter, even if it's just a coffee session, listening, and be ready with scripture. Find one verse of scripture and encourage your friends with the Word. Don't be people who talk with other people. Be people that encourage other people. You know, there's a verse of Scripture that says, only what is good, only what is what is. Set your minds on things that only what is good. Do not talk about other people. If it's not going to edify them, it's not going to grow them, if it's not going to build them up. That makes you wonder, I mean, if even in just this morning when you had a conversation with which feels like just a conversation, were you, were you building others up in that conversation, were you saying something that would build others up or were you just taking part in mindless chatter? Think about that. Be intentional about it in this week to come. Danny, we thank you very much for your time and for your continual growth. It has been an absolute blessing to me, and I know it will be to others as well. So we love you and we look forward to chatting with you again next week. Ciao.